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October 24, 2005
really, really, big
this may or may not be TMI. though, when has anything i've said actually been TMI?
i just took a huge dump. it was very girthy and so long that it was sticking out of the water like, an inch at least!!! i started the flushing before i could even wipe my butt because i knew it would probably not go down. and it didn't. i had to alternate about 7 flushing and plunging cycles before sitting down to give birth to another brown baby. okay. so then i had to continue to flush/plunger because the first baby was stuck or something and the water never filled up properly OR swirled around with very much force. garsh, i hate that. i am blaming all this big time pooping on eating "fast food" TWICE on saturday. it is the only thing i can think of that would do this. well maybe not, but it is easy to blame a lot of stuff on fast food.
the reason i ate fast food twice on saturday is because i went to grandview,wa to see the family farm for the last time. or so i am told. it is being sold to a mexi from california who bought it sight unseen. i can't understand why someone would buy a house sight UNSEEN. i mean, yeah, it's a old farmhouse and maybe that sounds like it might have "charm" or "character" but let me tell you, this place is pretty much a dump. oh, and speaking of dump, also purchased with this house was a lot of farm land, including something called "the pit" which is a hole that is used for dumping. according to my dad, "going to the dump gets pretty expensive". anyway. so where was i..? oh yeah, back to my own dump: i asked if we could go to lunch at the dairy queen there. i don't know why, maybe because it's the only place i remember going to around there. we (my mom,dad, and i) all ordered regular hamburgers and both M & D got pepsi's and i got a small blizzard. they gave us three cheeseburgers instead. it was okay but i got at least three or four chewy things in mine. the blizzard was ok. on the way home we stopped in smellensburg for dinner. we went to tacobell. did you know that taco bell no longer sells mexi-nuggets? they are now called "fiesta potatoes" and they are like homefries or something. i got those and a 7 layer burrito. also, a blue flavor blasted mt.dew. i was already still very gassy from dairy queen, and this also made be feel gross.
when i got home me and the core-dog went to go see the movie "goodnight and goodluck" and for some reason i thought it would be a good idea to buy popcorn and a cherry coke. this after already have two or three beers at the bar before hand. so yeah. maybe you can add in whatever i ate yesterday to the mix and that is why i clogged my own toilet. you probably don't want to, and i understand if you don't. really, i do.
here are some pictures (of saturday, not my dump):
oh, and scooter, if you read this, i forget how the leafmen story goes. please remind me...
Posted by alison at October 24, 2005 03:20 PM
Comments
Alison -
It's been a while since I dropped a deuce that peeked above water. But it always makes me happy when I do, 'cause then I feel like I have a friend that only I know about.
I like to pat them on the head every now and again.
Tyson
Posted by: Tyson at October 24, 2005 10:02 PM
a friend that only YOU know about.
we should meet up for coffee and talk abou this kind of stuff. i tried to talk to corey about it and for some reason he wasn't too interested.
Posted by: alison at October 25, 2005 08:30 AM
ok.. so the leafmen: the legend is, that dad had an older brother (patently false) who was out too late (just after the sun went down, when the sky starts to get dark blue everywhere) and you can sort of see the leaves, but mostly you hear them. The leafmen live in the trees, but you can't see them, when someone is looking, they turn into leaves. when you look away again, they are people/things, who reach down and grab children and haul them up into the trees, never to be seen again. i guess you turn into one if they catch you.
I guess the story was used to scare anyone who would hear it. i think it was made up by uncle billy, and passed down... though, i don't actually know. dad probably wouldn't tell because he insists they're real. to me anyway. .. you know...
Posted by: scoots at October 26, 2005 08:44 PM
so the leafmen ate dads fake older brother? or now dads fake older brother lives in the trees?
i'm scared.
Posted by: alison at October 27, 2005 09:10 AM